Saturday, November 13, 2010

I figured it out, I can see again

Today, I may have seen my most favorite picture ever taken of me. I'm at an engagement party, on a couch, surrounded by amazing friends. I'm laughing at something beyond the camera. And I look happy- down to my soul. And beautiful. This picture makes it very clear to me that the stupid, stupid boy who stood me up for Date 4 (4!!!) last night is missing out on something amazing (p.s. thanks to my New Waiting to Sleep With Guys philosophy, I hadn't slept with this guy yet, and I'm SOOOO fucking glad.)

And I'm not upset or depressed or feeling horrible about myself at all. I didn't waste one minute of my day pining for someone who doesn't deserve me. I went running in the park, I cleaned my apartment with my best friend in the whole wide world, then I went to a boot camp class, then I had dinner with Betsy, one of the most amazing friends I've ever had.

As I sat across from Betsy, I found myself talking about how having a relationship would really fuck up my life. How it would take away from all the things that I LOVE about my life now- the time I spend with my friends and my gym time and my nights of doing whatever the hell I want to do with whoever I want to do it with.

And I realized that it's time to stop bitching about being alone. Because really- alone is the last thing I am.

Today's Title from: So Here We Are by Bloc Party

No comments:

Post a Comment