Saturday, November 13, 2010

You just might find, you get what you need

Its been quite a week. My days swing violently from good to bad and I live in almost constant fear of losing my job as each successive person around me gets laid off. The continual praise from my boss comforts me, as does knowledge that I am almost the lowest paid person on my floor and doing 3 people's job successfully.

Even my life outside of work seems high on the drama with great dates and subsequent disappointment when he doesn't call, ubiqutious arguments over dinners, therapy, OA meetings and an almost complete inability to make sense of anything, or enough time to spend time with the people that I want to spend time with and an overwhelming desire to just be home on my couch, eating pizza and drinking wine.

I'm not depressed. I'm in a funk. I feel less than hopeful about my romantic future. With each successive disappointment, its hard to believe that anything real will ever happen for me or that I will ever actually be in love.

The good news is, BFF and I have booked tickets to go to Barcelona for memorial day weekend. We'll be there for 3 full days and it feels amazing to have to something so exciting to look forward to. Its over 2 months away and I've already got the basic geography of the city figured out, cause I'm a nutjob like that. If anyone has traveled there and has suggestions, please feel free to let me know!

Today's Title from: You Can't Always Get What You Want by The Rolling Stones

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